me myself and i

2005-01-19T22:33:00.000+08:00

beautiful ceiling.

2005-01-05T18:25:00.000+08:00

i have moved!

http://vintagge-maddy.blogspot.com

relink please!

2005-01-04T22:36:00.000+08:00

i'm taking a break from everything in my life.

i need some air.

2005-01-04T18:34:00.000+08:00

i feel guilty.
i told her how i really felt yesterday night.
i think she seems sad and all.
ps : if you are reading this, im sorry if i've hurt you. i don't mean any harm. i want you to know im not sad over you having him already. he's my best friend and forever he shall be. i love ya babe! cheer up!

school was okayy.
mrs chai was okay after all!
her english is great!
hope to improve under her!

i went to bedok north sec today.
this rellien lah.
for a while only.
its a big sch!

camp in sentosa from 10-12!

2005-01-03T19:13:00.000+08:00

it's first day of school today!
it's so fun!
im so happy!
i dunno what have gotten over me.
but well ya,
im trying to have a postive attitude towards life.
my ft seems nice!
thank god it isnt mrs sim!
oh mann!
my class ppl are funn!
just that a little bit too quiet!
but we are sitting at our registers.
so i cant sit wid janice and naomi!
oh there was this new gurl rachelle!
she's so pretty!
she's frm bedok south!
well, thats whye i went to find her ryte!
ahhahahah.
so whatever haaha.
we talked through out assembly.
she's a nice person la.

i feel so sad for rellien. she cried today. she dint like her class and i know how she feels.
asshole carine pang seh me for f&n. whatever.

2005-01-01T22:15:00.000+08:00

him as in my first love.
yepp.

the reason rocks!

2005-01-01T22:13:00.000+08:00

i feel quite forgiving.

he looks damn funny now.
no longer as cute as he was last time.
and im talking to his gf knoeee!
she's nice after all!

yes yes.
im over with him.

2005-01-01T15:14:00.000+08:00

love isnt all about faiytales.
having a prince charming and all.
you've got a price to pay when you're in love.
i think i'm tired.
i've got to face scolding.
i've got to face complains.
i've got to face fcuking bitches flirting with you.
i've got to face your cries.
i've got to face the shit of being a lousy gf.
i've got to face all your crap.
i've got to face all your insults.

you won't even know you are wrong.
you always don't like me to do things.
but you always did.
no one asked you to flirt with pinky.
no one asked you to play with her.
i know you want someone to like you other than me.
but don't be so desperate.
now that she likes you,
do you think she really do?
i know you feel proud and all.
she only chatted with you lesser than 2 hours.
she hasnt even seen you or your picture.

don't think im jumping onto conclusions.
i don't give a fuck anymore.

2005-01-01T13:51:00.000+08:00

i feel shit ;
i feel happy too.
school is startinggg!! and im so darn excited!
i prayed for very long just now.
around 3 plus.
i prayed that god would shower his protection on me.
gimme wise advices.
i love him so much.
not trying to be holy and all but he made me happy at the saddest times.

sec 3 this year.
i need to get my freedom and all.
i've got a lame wish.
but i wont write it here.
you guys will laugh your ass oud.

2005-01-01T02:38:00.000+08:00

he said he suffered alot in 2004.
bud whye did he bother to be with me?
i wished i was like melinda.
she said 2004 rocked.
i wished mine rocked too.

i hope someone can really understand how i really feel.
im just at a total loss.
happy new year every one.

lemme rock 2005 man!
no more heartaches!

2005 wish.
not to be tied down in relationships and screw exams.
top 15 in class.
be closer to god and closer to cell.
make right decesions.
find someone who really cares.
be happy everyday.
no heartaches.

2005-01-01T02:34:00.000+08:00

its year 2005!
im so glad 2004 is over!!!
it sucked so much oh myy!
im feeling so sad now.
i feel like crying and all.
i want someone to hugg!!
pls make 2005 a gud year.

2004-12-30T23:01:00.000+08:00

he's mad over me.
i dont give a damn.

long post.

2004-12-30T22:05:00.000+08:00

gonna type a long post now i guess.

its 30 dec today.
just one more day till year 2005.
this year; seriously sucked big time.
my parents had financial probs, mum had sleepdease,bro had sch probs, no maid and i had my own stuff too. its quite shit for me.
but i have seriously grown up quite alot after all this shit happened. well,if you know me since p6 that is.

begining i had to undergo this shit of being in a girl's school. very uncomfortable as i have always been in a mixed school since kindgarden or whatever. i guess i cried alot cause i missed my sec school friends. life in sec 1 rocked alot. i ahd such close friends and all. and i was so close to everyone and coming to school was like pure fun.

thank god, after a month. i managed to find my clique of friends in kc. bud i felt inferior to some people. i thought they hated me and true enough they did. bid i tried being nice and all and i hope ppl wont hate me cause i look dao. cause its just my face you know. so yeps. i learn to smile whenever i see someone look at me. i may look retarded bud i dun care. i dun living my life wid enemies. months and months passed and i had many much close friends.

cass was considered my big bud. without her, i guess some nice times wont happen. she allowed burger and i to go her hs to play. allowed us to attend her bdae party thou we dint give her prezzies. my bf had his first kiss at her hs. somehow i regretted snatching his first kiss, i think i dont deserve it cause i dun give him satisfaction. bud i love cass cause she was so nice and all. bud she dun love me anymore cos she has guys now :(

den came carine rellien and alisa. we spend our class time together and talked loads of cock. they are such fun people and all. most of my after sch days are wid carine and rellien. they are such rockers. they were my bombshelters. everytime when i go oud wid burger i hafta need them in case my mum calls and all. we spend our everydyay life just like that. we had loads of fun too. went to places like tm and bugis and all. so fun man. crapped around and all. and carine always felt like an extra. i get how she feels and all. bud she super rock please. always try to help me also.

den i got to really know ppl like june melinda and gen. june and melinda gives like super whooper good advices. always tag my blog to cheer me up when i sound sad. and june is super woman always scolding unknown ppl for me. hahahas. she'[s damn funny. melinda is damn sweet and all. always full of nice things. and gen i got to know her better since dunno when. she's one funny person and she ful of jokes too. she look kinda fierce bud she is super whooper nice when you get to knoe her and all.

rest of the bunch ppl are like xinni, chang, melissa, cheryl yeo, iris and all lah. they are pretty cool ppl too. i had so much fun in 2/6 thou i had only one year wid them.

and i know melissa cheong! ha! she said she once disliked me bud now we are ok i guess. man she is one fun person so nice to talk to and all. she gives nice advices and all and talking to her online is sucha nice thing cause she has loads of stuff to share wid me and i find it very sweet. sometimes when she tel me her love stories i feel so happy for her cause i guessed i never felt this way before and yah. so she'[s one gud fren and sadly haven been oud wid her yet :(

what else.
learnt that my bro and i are losers in love. we have a perfect start bud a terrible process and disastrous ending. my first love and i thou werent together bud i had the nicest time in my whole life and i love him like so much and we ended wid just a damn matter and he has a gf now and fuck it i dun care. my first bf i went wid him w/out really loving him. bud when we were together i kinda like him and we broke up and we had such shit when we broke up. he stead with my god sis two days after i break up with him and that hurt me alot.

i have my bf now. he was once my god bro. i love him and yes we went together. bud now that we are together. it didnt seem as nice as what we thought. we had more pain than happiness. as i said i dint think i deserve him and sometimes i feel like shit when im wid him. i duno wther he really loves me and all. all i knoe we suffered alot when we were together. i just wish that we would be happy and all. sometimes i wonder if he's the one for me. im not sure all i knoe is that i wont wanna faall in love anymore cause it sucks and it sucks. this sounds bad bud i wished would fall for some one else. i think he will be happier too. bud i knoe he loves me all and yah. bud wads the point of being together when the both of us are not happy.

i want someone who will be there for me every hour and all. someone who will always listen to all my crap. someone who will be there when i cry. just someone who will understand me and all. i hope he/she is there.

a new year is coming and i just hope stuff turns oud fine and all. bet it's gonna suck. i feel fucked up somehow. im so glad im getting close to god. i love him so much and all. although my life is in a mess, bud i knoe he will show me a way. im just sick and tired of everything.

i need a guardian angel.

long post.

2004-12-30T20:04:00.000+08:00

long post.

2004-12-30T20:03:00.000+08:00

long post.

2004-12-30T20:01:00.000+08:00

i went to carine's house today.
her bro is oh-so-cuteeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
at one period of time,
he came out of the toilet crying!
" my ku ku bird very pain! "
it made me and carine laughed non stop.
i think he loves me hahaas.

2004-12-29T22:57:00.000+08:00

2005 is coming.
i hope it's a new year,
and also a better one.
this year is prob the worst year i ever had.

i fee so weird.
this song used to make me happy ;
bud..

2004-12-29T21:24:00.000+08:00

im at my cousin's house now.
and JEREMY TAN IS IRRITATING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

come online please honeyy!

bad

2004-12-29T13:00:00.000+08:00

i just bought my first handbag.
dunno what got over me.
but i loved it!
its guess and its super cool !

going to pop over my cousin's house today.
my grandma bdae.
se's 85 years old!
long life ehh!

im feeling ok.
but bad too.

2004-12-26T22:28:00.000+08:00

i wonder if guys mean what they say.

weird to think that i'm crying now.
which is really weird.

i dunno wad am i talking about ;
neither do i wanna care.

2004-12-26T22:21:00.000+08:00

i feel rejected.
as in really rejected.

nothing lasts forever.
and i know it myself.

2004-12-26T22:18:00.000+08:00

x'mas yesterday was spend with my parents.
we dint eat at sheraton!
grrrr!
we went to bukit timah area to eat.
and i saw the jean yip boss.
yes the main boss.
she seems normal?
after eating we went to swensens.
i was so full!

hey

2004-12-25T16:27:00.000+08:00

christmas.

there isnt you or you around me.
sad xmas.
and those who i asked for ur address to send xmas cards.
i wont be able to send it on time bud it wil come ok!

im going to sheraton hotel for xmas dinner later.
at least sth to look forward to.

i feel sad.
don't you think the both of us are like friends now?
not even close friends.
we were supposed to be a couple!
whatever it is,
i shant think about it anymore

sad

2004-12-25T01:03:00.000+08:00

why must all bad things come today?
whye must you do this?
what's with the rest period?
lost a friend again.
fuck it.

i'm so tired man.
a new year is coming.
this year xmas is nothing again.
at least last year wasnt that bad.
shit la.

if we have to end this relationship ;
than haiz.

whatever la.
enuff of love.

merry xmas!

merry xmas everyone.

back

2004-12-25T01:01:00.000+08:00

i just came back from malaysia!
fun trip i guess!

21 dec 2004 tues
set out to malaysia aroud 8 plus.
we reached there around 3.
i went wid my relatives.
so glad my cousin jeremy came! and boyy, so fun!
he, my younger cousin and i set at the back of my car.
we were making so much noise through oud the trip and my dad screwed us.
i was so tired when i reached malaysia
and all i did was to jump onto my room bed.
i slept the way through.
my cousins went to the whirlpool and suana.
bud i can't go.
cause of my frigging period.
I HATE PERIODS.
after everything,
we went for dinner.
the food was so damn niceee!!
we went to KLCC after that.
i bought like loads and loads of toiletries.
my cousin and i walked around ourselves.
we went to coffeebean and drank!
and we took loads of pictures!!
there's this new quiksilver shop which is like super cool!
i took the picture of it.
i shall post it later!
that's all for that day.

22 dec 2004 wed
went to breakfast.
the food was only okay.
weird day today.
my cousin and i went to the indoor theme park at times square.
the rollercoaster was like super fun!
i was like screaming at the top of my voice.
so thrilling!
me and my cousin kept trying that.
then we tried this ride called the dna mixer.
damn fcuking giddy.
and my cousin's hp dropped off!
so poor thing!
there were so many scratches on the phone!
we went back to the hotel after that.
after resting and all,
we went to KLCC again.
i bought loads of toiletries again.
i wanted to buy this lucido wax.
the bottle was like so niceeeeeeeee!
we went to the same place to eat again.
bud diff food!
shark fins!! and super cheap!
so cool, we managed to go to chinatown for the night market!
i love night markets!
so nice and all!
i wanted to buy this louis vuitton bag!
bud nvm.
shopped around and yepps,
thats all.

23 dec 2004 thurs
we all slept till abt 11.
and we had the famous yong tau foo for lunch.
so yummy!
looked around jusco after lunch.
pretty boring placee!so we travelled to petaling jaya to this super big shopping centre!
super cool place!
it had so many cool shops!
like mambo!
i will post the pics later on.
didnt buy much stuff actually.
went to chinatown again.
dad bought this fake rolex. bud it looks so damn real!
lazy to write.
budd ya thats abt all!
nice trip and fun one too!

man

2004-12-20T18:41:00.000+08:00

i'm going to malaysia tomorrow.
i'm so gonna miss youu-*

bless me.
im gonna be back on 24th.
anyone wants to go oud wid me on 24 and 25?

i love myself.
and im sad.
i feel guilty.

yay

2004-12-20T13:26:00.000+08:00

my great friend rellien has SUPERB taste.

i'm really sad.
i hate breaking people's heart.
forgive me kay?

i love you.

and i LOVE MY 10 BESTIESSSSSSSSSS!

ben

2004-12-19T23:54:00.000+08:00

i feel so sad now.
i want to cry.

hmm

2004-12-19T15:16:00.000+08:00

i love that britney spears song.

budd this is sweeter.
it makes me happy =))

melinda and i love the song haha! hi5!

hey

2004-12-18T17:52:00.000+08:00

i've got fettish for painful pictures.
you know those pictures.
super nice.
yumms :)
sadist bud its okay.

when you're in love ;
everything seems like a wonderland.
if you don't feel this way,
its not true love.

TRUE LOVE COMES ONLY ONCE.

haiz

2004-12-18T16:45:00.000+08:00

i know you cant hear me Santa.
you were never real ryte.

just a happy and smooth xmas.
i wont let anything get the better of me next year.

man

2004-12-18T16:37:00.000+08:00

i would be lying if i'm happy.

god, thanks for counting every tear drop of mine.
cause no one wil care to count them for me.
i love youu god.

god will make a way.
thats what han long told me.

branded goods were the only stuff i have ever wanted.
now i only hope to be happy.
very happy.
i know these days wont come back.
but its okay.

my pri school friends told me.
cutting wrists are great.

well, you told me not to drink vodka.
now i know what to do when im sad.

haiz

2004-12-18T14:58:00.000+08:00

i wonder why my brother and i are losers in love.

hmm

2004-12-18T14:14:00.000+08:00

oh man.
i cant take it anymore.

SHIT MY LIFE.

gr

2004-12-17T21:32:00.000+08:00

where are youu?

mann

2004-12-17T21:25:00.001+08:00

oh dear.
i seriously cant stand all those pictures.
those scissors, paper, stone, one, two, pictures.

ah lians are seriously weird people.

kAwAii NeHxxx
blEaHx.
iNnOCeNt GeR gEr.
ShOO UGlY hOrxXx

MANN, ISNT IT URGHHHSSS-

mann

2004-12-17T21:25:00.000+08:00

hmm

2004-12-17T20:24:00.000+08:00

carine is scolding me now.
am i really that mean?

i feel like a sandwich.
i feel sad.
i want his smile =)

h

2004-12-16T22:47:00.000+08:00

i got a feeling.
we are together.
because we've been through so much.
and we just don't want to let go.

i guess thats what youu feel too.

2004-12-16T21:41:00.000+08:00

i think that xiao cai person in like my own is cute.

i saw him in real person before.
pity he's kinda short. :)
sth is seriously wrong wid me.

fuck

2004-12-16T21:32:00.000+08:00

i just watched like my own.
i thank god that i never had a best friend who liked the same guy as me before.
i think no one dares too.
as in my close friends.

i feel like a bitch.
total bitch.
i had a god sis joanne.
she was my 1st friend in sec school.
she loved a guy called bertrand.
she would tell me all the good things about him.
saying how sweet he is.
and how cute he is.

and what i did ;
was to took him away from her to made him mine thou i dint love him at all.
cause i wanted him to forget my first love.
i feel like sucha bitch.
a bitch.
a bitch.
why didnt i think about her?
and she never minds me.

lets say about weixiong.
she had him FIRST.
and now i'm widd him again.
why didnt i thought of her when i made him my bf?
i didnt think if she liked him or not?
why am i liddat.

i know its all in the history.
budd i hate myself.
for doing this.
i wont ever love my best friend's boyfren/crush again.
and if my good friend ever fal in love wid my boyfren/crush.
i will give him to her.
i wanna replace my wrong deeds.
i want to know the feeling of my crush/bf being snatched by my close friend.

i sound like im mad.
yes i am.
i am.

ben

2004-12-16T17:13:00.000+08:00

I don't want another pretty face
I don't want just anyone to hold
I don't want my love to go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You're the one I wanna chase
You're the one I wanna hold
I wont let another minute go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
I know that you are something special
To you I'd be always faithful
I want to be what you always needed
Then I hope you'll see the heart in me
Your beautiful soul, yeah
You might need time to think it over
But im just fine moving forward
I'll ease your mind
If you give me the chance
I will never make you cry c`mon lets try
Am I crazy for wanting you
Baby do you think you could want me too
I don't wanna waste your time
Do you see things the way I do
I just wanna know if you feel it too
There is nothing left to hide

you said you wont make me cry :)
i love this song because you said that you meant every word the lyrics said.

la la la la la la la la .

hm

2004-12-16T17:00:00.000+08:00

i ate durians just now.
AGAIN.

during the feast ;
my parents talked about my bro.

mum : aiyah, all my friend's son are doctors, lawyer or grads. look at your brother. 21 years
old still in poly. lou heh(canto) ah.
dad : what to do? our both children don't study. now i can only place my hope on daughter.
me : i cannot be a doctor already LA.
dad : you know what i want you to be? i want you to be a reporter. go all around the world.
me : -.-"

perhaps being a reporter aint that bad yah.
its almost the same as being a journalist.
somehow ;
got this urge to studyy really hard now. :)
mann, i sound lame.

heyy

2004-12-16T11:49:00.000+08:00

I LOVE DIMPLES !!

i wanna see happy pages on my diary.
i wanna sing happy love songs.
i wanna smile for no reason.
i wanna hug my bolster for nothing.
i wanna dance wid no steps.
i wanna dream.
i wanna write happy love poems.

all this isnt happening.

i want you underneath my christmas tree.
my only wishh.

mann

2004-12-15T21:42:00.000+08:00

being confused sucks.
super suckyy.
why is all this shit happening?
i don't want to break his heart.
budd oh mann.
you cant have everything.
life is all about decesions.

i gotto choose my own happiness.
im very sure.
if im not happy wid my boyfren.
im gonna break up wid him and be sibs once again.
i miss the feeling.
i really do.
im gonna write it even if you're angry.
budd thats how i feel.

boo

2004-12-15T21:08:00.000+08:00

i love this songg.

thou it reminds me of stuff. sad stuff.

gee

2004-12-15T20:16:00.000+08:00

im damn confused.
as in really really confused.
im stuck.
who who who who?

i hate breaking people's heart.
it just gives me this guilt.

i went ta haagen dazs today.
YUMMY!
i hope i'm happy everyday. everyday.
xmas is comingg =))

dilemma.confused.stuck.mad.sad.happy.angry charms.

shitified x(

2004-12-14T18:28:00.000+08:00

this year passed in sucha fast pace.
i cant even catch upp.
this year seriously sucked ; and i mean it.
i just hope things get better next year.
its ending soon.

i know what i want.
i want a simple life widd friends just all around me.

im sad im sad im sad.
being in love hurts and hurts and hurts.

sick

2004-12-14T18:23:00.000+08:00

sometimes i wished i was better off single.
sometimes i wished i never known youu.
sometimes i wsihed we were still sibs.
we were happier then and youu know it?

i missed the times.
when we just started falling in love wid one another.
that was so sweet and so nice.
now that we're together?
where's all the happiness?
ALL GONE!

dict

2004-12-14T18:17:00.000+08:00

heyy.
thanks dict fer introducing me this song.
i so love it. =))
you're the nicest!

sadd

2004-12-14T17:53:00.000+08:00

i'm feeling so sad inside me?
will youu even understand how i feel?
who will be happy when they cant celebrate their 1 year?
do youu think im rejoicing inside?
you won't understand.
cause your parents give youu freedom?
you think i can go oud anytime i want?
look man.
if we're happy together,
everyday it feels as if we are celebrating ours 1st year?

counting the days back.
last year.
14 dec 2003.
it was sucha perfect dayy.
probably one of the bestest days i ever had.
its all gone and all gone.
im sick and tired

shit

2004-12-14T13:46:00.000+08:00

i'm utterly depressed.

this is so not happening! -urghs!

youu call this 1 year?

campp!

2004-12-12T22:34:00.000+08:00

heyy! havent been blogging for two dayys! i went to my church's youth camp! darn, it was meaningful! i made new friends too!

Friday 10 dec 2004
prepared to go to campp. was pretty reluctant! cause i only knoe rina in the camp. i hate being alonee la. when i reached the downtown eaat bus stop, l was like the only person theree. stupid rina havent come yet. bad start!
when we're done and go ready, proceeded to the costa sands resorts in edwin car. edwin is like a leader, he's super nice. and there was this guyy called han longg. nth much abt him at first.
first programme for campp. was this whacko game. i think youu guys knoe wad it is ryte. first person who called my name was hanlong! you trying to sabo me rytee! was frigging shocked at first. someone i dint even said hi too called my name. -.-" wanted to call his name back bud i've a problem pronouncing his name. i had fun anywayy. =)

leme see who went to the camp. (for that fcuker who wil wanna knoe)
rina,kenny,kelvin,hanlong,raina,louisa,aloysius,zaw tun,phoebe,cassandra,adeline,marc,bob,edwin,thomas,annalisa.

we had many sessions after the gamee. was seriously tired okayy. imagine sitting there and listen to pastor talk for hours. darn tired. dinner was delicious!
roomates fer this camp was raina and rina! dun the name sound alikee? it is! raina is my new friend too. she's super whooper sweet!

nothing much todayy, talked on the phone awhile and went to sleep! snorees-

Saturday 11 Dec 2004
woke up at 7. earlier than my both roomates cause i wanted to bathe and i had ta wear my contacts. was so tired please. we had sessions again. mann, it was seriously LONG! i can actually doze off please. budd pastor taught about inferiority and pride. just what i needed the most. so i learnt that, god is very fair and he made every single one of us special in his eyes and i shouldnt be putting myself down alwayys.
we set in a circle. and pastor prayed for all of us in tongues. it did touched me. then we sat in a circle and passed the mike around to say about what we have learnt.
pastor forced me to sayy sth! threaten me wid my dad! grrrr!

than after all this sessions. we had beach games around 3.30. mann! those games were funn! we were divided into 2 groups. i had hanlong,kenny,raina,melissa,cassandra and aloysius in my group. hanlong was so poor thingg alritess! i sabo him to be the volunteer and he had whipped cream on his headd! poor thangg! we had 3 games! and my group won all 3 gamess! gotta thank edwin for all this gamees! youu rock lahh!

after all this games. we washed up and had dinner! dinner was yummy!! i ate alot! cause i was so hungryy! after eatingg, we went to white sands! we had this little event, where you are supposed to pick a paper to choose your mortal and buy a pres for him/her! i got hanlong! hahass=) so funny. i bought him a cup, wid his name and my name(as in from:) and bought a bar of toberlone and ritter sport for him! i don't mind spending a little more for him. cause he's a super nice fellar so yahh!

after getting all our stuff, adeline,marc bought durians! i love durianss! its so yummy! they bought ice cream too. hanlong was in charge of scooping ice cream for us. he had a hard time and when he served me i didnt eat. i was like the only one who didnt eat and i felt so wrongg!

we exchanged presents. i was my tution teacher mortal! can youu believe it? hahas, he bought me a pink sockss! madd ass! hahs. we had a great night feast. listened to music and zaw tun was singing blue songss! pastor came back and he was so happy to see the durianss! hahhs! we cleared up and was getting ready to sleep!

budd me and rina decided to go the the hall instead. where the guys were! they were singing and singing! and talkingg! they are fun people! and poor kenny was doing his chinese work! what to do, dunman high ok! dun play play! =) hanlong sings damn well! i wished i had his vocals! he can sing so many songs! we fixed jigsaw puzzle. me and wx was quarreling over the phone. than my stupid tution teacher was like " waw, got popcorns anot? nice show mann! " -.-"

we were supposed to fix the whole 1000 pieces jigsaw puzzle but in the end we went to walk aroundd! after walking, hanlong came to me and rina's room. he wanted to talk to me about my relationship. he gives really good advices. and i think he's very super nice. super super. hoped he was my older bro or sth. gentle man lahh hahhas!

yahh, so thats all for the 2 dayys! =)

fuck

2004-12-10T11:31:00.000+08:00

fuck the previous entries.
something is wrongg wid my com ytd.

its a fucking shite day yesterdae.
went to work.
sell some lame postcards fer 5 dollars a packet.
who the hell wil buyy.
only those fucking chinese sluts and ah lians have a way wid those school boys by flirtingg.
damn job make me feel so rejected.
whye am i so desperate to work.
so not me.
told youu i aint being myself anymoree.

catched christmas wid the kranks yesterday.
its a comedy.
kinda nicee knoee.

accidentally in love wid youu i gueess. -

haiz

2004-12-09T23:30:00.003+08:00

haiz

2004-12-09T23:30:00.002+08:00

haiz

2004-12-09T23:30:00.001+08:00

haiz

2004-12-09T23:30:00.000+08:00

man

2004-12-08T19:29:00.000+08:00

do youu know im crying within?
do youu know im sad?

i dunno if im at the fault.
budd you're doing things that are making me pissed off.
i think the love you have for me is gonee.
if thats the case.
please tell me.
cause i dun want my heart to hurt anymore.

thank youu.

I HATE CHINESE AH LIANS!!!!!!!

hmm

2004-12-06T19:24:00.000+08:00

you are seriously making me hate youu so much.
whye is it that youu can decide things for me budd i cant?
whye is it that you can do stuff budd i cant?
whye is it you have the liberty to get jealous and i cant?
whye is it that you arent happy wid me all the time?
i want to tell youu that i am your girlfriend and yet still a human being.
thank youu.

-i hate my life please-

went to tampines mall wid carine to look for job.
the minimum age is 16 budd too bad im only 14.
i feel so shitified these few days.
its like ; im not charmaine anymore.
i dun think anyone understands me.
just that i need some shoulder to cryy on.
are you willing?

shite

2004-12-06T00:27:00.000+08:00

why is it that you can go oud widd a gurl alone ;
bud i cant go oud wid a guy alone.

why is it that you can do so many stuff ;
budd i hafta listen to youu.

and when i get jealous ;
u say i dun trust youu.

im sick of all the shite that is happening in my life now.
just stop making my heart bleed.
i had enoughh already.

fuck you.

2004-12-05T23:52:00.000+08:00

i only have one sentence to sayy.

guys are heartaches.
everything is going wrongg.

im back!

2004-12-05T17:30:00.000+08:00

im finally back from malaysia. i had funn i guess. here's what i did LA.

friday
met my dad's friend and his family at second link ard 2 plus. his sons were there. all 4 of em. they are great bunch of people i tell youu. esp the oldest one. he got into triple science, how smart can he get? alrites, so we left for Kuala Lumpur and we reaches the hotel Grand Maya around 6 plus.

Guess what, Zouk was just directly opposite my hotel! Just one road distance. I was screaming like fuck kae. The place is so darn cool. My brother and hong yao(the oldest son) were swearing to go there. My parents and his parents had to go to some dinner. So left me and my bro in the room. We ordered food from the room service. I ordered Nasi Goreng and Blackforest Cake whereas my bro ordered Nasi Lemak and American Cheese Cake. We were expecting horrible food bud it ended up that the food tasted heavenly.

Left for KLCC Suria after our parents came back from their dinner. The stuff there are cheaper actually. I didnt buy much stuff thouu. I bought veet hahhas. Thats all for friday.

saturday
today was a prettay long day actually. ate buffet breakfast in the hotel. the food is quita fine. after that, we rested in the hotel room for aout 2 hrs. than we headed to Mid-Valley Megamall. that was super bigg wid many surf shops. i didnt buy anything from those shops. i wanted to buy the handbag budd i didnt.

went to levis store and i saw this long sleeve shirt. fucking nice and I bought it! I love it, was a type one model. I love the paper bagg they gave when i bought the t-shirt. Was like hugging it like mad.

here's the big incident. i went to meet my mum at this aroma therapy station. she was having some free trial massage for her hands. all my friends were there and yahh. then hong wei (the third son) was running here and there. and suddenly, he accidentally dropped the whole fake wall. you know that kinda wall that is movable, the kind when you push and it drops. and those few bottles that are displayed on the wall thing broke.

you should have seen hong wei's face. his whole face was so white and he didnt even move a bit.
i guess he was really scared. anyone would be scared ryte. i was like hugging him hoping to de-stress him a little. he cried like madd and my dad brought him to eat ice-cream. my dad and his dad has to write a report about the whole damn thing and in the end it was settled. my heart was pumping like fuck when the thing dropped. little kids shouldnt run around.

went walking around that damn place. nothing much actually. bought 3 hairbands. met the four guys and their parents at 5. hong yao bought 5 shirts. he's fucking rich please. so guess what i did, i pestered that fellar to buy a levis t shirt so that i wil have another paper bags. i have fettish fer branded paper bags somehow. he rejected me at first, budd when i kept asking him. he gave in to me. so we went from the north side of the mall to the south side just to go to the levis store. and he had to buy a shirt so that i have the paper bag. 60 bucks is nothing to him i guess. thanks la hong yao if u're seeing this! x))

got ready for clubbing. put on make up and stuff to look older. we went to some lame cultural dinner and the food sucked big time. YIKES. after dinner, we were preparing to go Zouk already. then my fcuking dad's friend suddenly called him to go to some pub fer some drinks. and in the end we didnt go Zouk. its quite shite actually. my bro and I was super pissed. 45rm to go in anyway. never mind, im going on 21 again. so slept, fun day anyway.

sunday
nothing much so far. ate bak kut teh as brunch. and i headed back fer spore.
had fun actually yepps. x)

dang

2004-12-02T17:51:00.000+08:00

i've got this sixth sense telling me that this year will end in a super terrible wayy.
and i'm meaning my love life.
i dunno why the hell my bf keeps digging me upp.
seriously im really pissed now.

im going to masia tomorrow and i'll be back on sun nite.
hope my good friends go too.
im sick.

hmms.

2004-12-01T23:46:00.000+08:00

i love sly. budd he lost to taufik. almost made me cry. budd i didnt. =(
im fine wid taufik too.

carine and weixiong thinks dan is ugly.
is he? no okay!
whatever, none of my buisness.

iam fine

2004-12-01T15:07:00.000+08:00

i am just living each day.
thinking that thing hasnt happened.

i am happy, very happy.

mans

2004-11-30T23:53:00.000+08:00

i dont like him.
i dont like him.
i dont like him.

i'm not jealous.
and i'm living in the present now.

just shoo.

2004-11-30T13:16:00.000+08:00

he was the one.
the one the one.

i cant help being sad.
im just feeling weird.
i guess i'm jealous.
i really am.

bud look ;
whats the point of dwelling in the past?
its already history.

so im still living on.
I'M VERY HAPPY FOR YOU DAN.

2004-11-29T22:59:00.000+08:00

its better to have love and lost i mean.

ignorance is blissful.

2004-11-29T22:43:00.000+08:00

ignorance is blissful.
i dont want to know anything that is related to dan anymore.
i dont want i dont want.
take it that i'm jealous.

well, after all, its better to have lost and lost.
i had my fun, i had my happiness.
its time to let go.

i've got a bf too.
big deal if you've a fucking girlfriend.
i love my bf
and you just fuck off from my life.

i love you NO MORE!

i am sad

2004-11-29T19:22:00.000+08:00

my heart is shattered into a zillion pieces.

i don't want to live on anymore.

bored.

2004-11-28T23:45:00.000+08:00

i jus changed my blogg skin. sassy aint it? i love it.
guess wad, i didnt save my previous template and all my links are GONE!
and i seriously cant rmb who did i link// so people oud dere, if you want me to link you, tagg me alrites.

went to church and stuff liddat.
and then to expo. went to look for digital cams. i think i want a canon ixus. its handy and stylish.
came home and stuff.
went ta my cousin's house fer dinner.
it was prettay gud lahh.

i miss you lah.

boring and sad!

2004-11-27T23:27:00.000+08:00

i got slapped by my mum today. i quarreled widd my mum today. i cant stand her. she just pisses me off. she scolded me STUPID and i was super insulted. i nearly left home today budd my mum and dad pulled me back. i feel so embarrased please.

and then, i was supposed to meet my bf and people at escape today. i told him i wasnt very sure if i can go oud budd he assumed i could. so this smart alec, went there before me calling him to confirm if i could go. so yah he got pissed off and he scolded me.

imagine me being slapped by my mum and scolded by my bf. you know how saddening it is. so i juss slammed down his phone and i literally cried. i'm sad//.

im fine wid him now.

a fake smile you see//

shite u.

2004-11-26T22:56:00.000+08:00

i am not a good girlfriend.
i cant talk to you well.

jus shoo off.

fucking boringg!

2004-11-26T16:23:00.000+08:00

i have been spending my days, stoning and lazing around. no human beings are asking me oudd and this is terrible. actually, its because my buddies arent available or whatever. rellien is going back to indo today. so shit please. i bet her alex is gonna miss her truckloads.

i've got more than 30 xmas cards to buy fer people and i'm so gonna be broke after xmas. mum says she's gonna buy me a levis jeans and she better remember it. i fell in love wid this adidas retro watch and i hope dad gets me this fer my xmas pressie. i haven been wearing a watch fer longg!

i cant wait for school to reopen so i can make new friends. budd i know once school reopens, i wil wish for holidays once again. thats me, im never satisfied.

xmas is coming ; and i plan to spend xmas eve in orchard. churches are setting up stores and perfomances in orchard so i would spend my day there. i've got a new friend who loves cakes juss like me! i'm so happy hahas.

i am running out of stuff to write now and then. my life is like a straight line, no ups no downs.

i love you do you know?

2004-11-25T15:40:00.000+08:00

Another onee! I love my besties!!!

2004-11-25T15:38:00.000+08:00

Cute arent we? Hahhas. I look retarded hereee!

anotha dae.

2004-11-24T01:29:00.000+08:00

its anotha dae stucked at home.
omygawd, its super boring i tell you.
i spend my whole day reading Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.
Lame I know lahh.
Budd i was that desperate to do something yahh.

i ate porridge fer lunch.
mama cooked it.

we went to parkway today.
my whole family.
my bro wanted to get his new specs.
i fell it love wid this levis specs.
its so frigging cool please.
if i had it,
im gonna have a levis bag,wallet and specs hahas.

im looking fer a friggin job.
i wanted to work at mac.
bud carine was like,
u cant even carry your own bowl of guo tiao tang in school!
well, thats true.
she's da one that carries it.
oh yahh.
appeals werent succesful.
im stuck in 3.4 wid carine.
at least i have her.

went to swensens changi airport after bro got his specs.
despite reaching dere ard 10.15,
there were stil many people.
me and my bro had a fun time laughing at those stewards and stewardess.
my bro wants to be a steward.
get a life LA. hhaas.
i love to go to the airport.
to see aeroplanes taking off and landing down.
it gives me a sense of satisfaction and happiness.
i love to go dere.
it makes me super whooper happy.
even happier if im gonna travel somwhere.

tomorrow, those P6s are getting back their results.
its been 2 whole years.
2 years ago, i was also getting back mine.
i miss those days in pri school.
i miss everyone.
and i miss you too.
if time was able to be turned back ;
there were many things i wished to do.
i love my pri 6 life.
and i miss it like fcuk.
you guys wont ever know how wonderful that year actually is.

to love someone and to be loved.
thats the best thingg god has ever given me.

at least i had him once.

christmas muss be different this year.
i miss rina mandy natalie jolene DAN marcus jeremy dewayne gabriel and chanwei.
you guys rock my ass maha.

2/6 rocks. x))
so does 1/4(2003) bvss.

high class?

2004-11-22T17:45:00.000+08:00

its a prettay lame day todayy.
not mucha stuff to type actually.
Budd yahh, im super whooper bored.

Woke up in the morning,
was like preparing to study my biology.
then mum was like,
let's go to Crystal Jade at Paragon.
i hate last minute arrangments.
i take 1/2 hr to choose my clothes.
20 mins to bathe.
10 mins to put o my fucking contact lens.
15 mins to dress up kinda thingg.
so that explains whye im always late for appointment.

the restaurant is so frigging classy please.
super super nice.
i think its the nicest crystal jade branch.
the food is okay.

thats all.

urghs.

2004-11-21T22:07:00.000+08:00

urghs.
i seriously hate being sick and sick and sick. =S
frigging running nose and a sorethroat. all this ever since i went ta chalet.
im hoping for anotha chalet! omygawd, it so rawks please.
i got all the stuff fer sch next year.
i need a new pencil box and new school shoes.
i've got da rest!

its still early actually.
my christmas wish this year : YOO.
i wanna spend christmas wid my friends in town.
walking and chatting tilll late at nite,
clubbing and drinking all the way.
its so gonna be impossible.
i have never ever spend xmas in a peculiar way before. NEVER.
i hope this year turns oud different.

heys boyfriend.
thank god your hp got confiscated. (sacarsm kaes)
so shitified please.
its lands down to me and you,
not having a hp.
carine gonna be the messenger again.
i think im missing you somehow.
i haven been telling you stuff like 'i love you'
budd i guess, i still do.
something is stopping me from being as expressive as i once was.
sorry, cause the past is hurting me.
hope you understand.
we are almost a year (i cant blif it!)

to the constant readers oud dere.
if you guys notice, i haven been writing all the mushy stuff boudd me and my boyfriend already. and most of my blog posts these days are pretty sad. im stil wid him thou.hhaas.

im starting to love sly.
sorry to the taufik fans.
i m fine wid him too.
anyway, i cant believe sly mum is so shite.
and the press shouldnt have published all this stuff at this period of time.
a normal human being like sly would definitely be distracted.
riteee?

im missing someone very much.

guysss!

2004-11-20T18:00:00.000+08:00

Ultimate Opposite Sex Survey (for girls)
Created by okwhtsplanb and taken 17263 times on bzoink!
--Your Favorite--
Hair Color:	light brown.
Eye Color:	goldish brown. juss like minee.
(Their)Music Genre Preference:	r&b,hip-hop.
Height(estimate):	175 and abv.
Age:	fer now : 14 years old.
Personality Type:	daredevil.
--This or That--
Older or Younger:	ermms- older.
Romantic or Horndog:	romantic.
Smart or Stupid:	smart lahh!
Fat or Skinny:	skinny!
Skinny but Muscular or Big and Muscular:	big as in how big? hhaas.
Punk or Preppy:	punk!
The Big Picture or the Little Things:	huhss-
Flowers/Candy or Big Expensive Present:	Flowers/candy.
Mixtape or Burned CD:	burned cd.
Love or Lust:	LOVE!
Emotional or Just Not:	just not.
Sincere or Jokester:	jokester.
Hott and mean or Ugly and sweet:	ugly and sweet.
Sexy or Just "cute":	sexxayy!
Arse or Abs:	ABS!
Hair or Hands:	hands.
Dimples or Eyes:	DIMPLESSS!
Biceps or Calves/Thighs:	biceps.
Teeth or Nose(some people are just wierd) :	what the?
Clean Shaven or Scruffy:	clean shaven!
Rugged or Prim and Proper:	Rugged.
Countryboy or Cityboy	Cityboy lahh!
Date alone or With Friends	Date alone.
Mama's Boy or Rebel Without A Cause:	Rebel!
--Have You Ever--
Dumped a guy because he liked you too much:	yeppers.
Loved a guy because he stalked you:	nonono!
Loved a guy because he hated you:	ermms. nope!
Asked your friend's crush out:	nahhs, im nt some bitch.
Lead a guy on for kicks:	huhss=
Asked a guy out purely because he was hott:	Yepps,hahs.
Flirted with guys even though you had a boyfriend:	errrs-yahh. LAST TIME!
Lied about not having a boyfriend:	Yeppers.
Lied about having one:	nahhs.
Cheated:	NOPE!
Been Cheated on:	NOPE!
Had a crush on a gay guy:	no lahhs.
--Their Clothing(yes/no)--
Boxers?:	yes yes yes!
Briefs?:	yes no yes no!
Hat?:	errs-
Skater Shoes?:	wads tt
Pimp Shoes?:	Hmphh.
Band Shirts?:	URGH. no!
Vintage shirts?:	maybe.
Southpole/um..other thug clothes..?:	uhhs
Dixie Outfitters/Big Johnsons?:	umms.
Independent/DC?:	DC!
Skavenger/UGP?:	errs-
Fox/Thor?:	Foxx!
Jeans or Shorts?:	Jeanss!
--Be Honest--
Would you ever date a guy for his money?:	nope. normalie rich guys are assholes.
Would you ever date a guy for his social status?:	if he is nice.
Have you ever liked hanging out with your bf's friends more than him?:	hahahs, talking maybe.
Have you ever pretended to like somebody to make them feel better?	no waee!
Have you called a girl a whore, when you were screwing lots of guys?:	nahhs.
Do looks matter?:	wells, nt really.
Are you honestly scared of being dumped?:	of course!
Does size matter?:	erms, fer me yesh.
Do you avoid 'situations' with ugly guys?:	i wun!
Are you ashamed to be seen with your ugly friends?:	huhh, wad do mean by ugly? it doesnt matter pls.
Are you ashamed for being ashamed?(you better be):	im nt ashamed.
Do you hide things from your crushes/guy friends/bf?:	yesh.
Do you lie about masturbation for attention or false innocence?:	no! is tt so cool?
Do you really want a guy to say if those jeans make your butt look fat?:	no!
Are you dissapointed when your bf doesn't say I love you right away?:	i like unexpressive guys.
Wanna be a virgin till marriage?	YEPPERS.
Do you really love the guys everytime that you say it?	err-
Do you dream about your crushes/bfs/guy friends?:	yeppers.
Would you makeout with a guy friend just to get it over with/curiosity?:	NAH
Does this survey suck nuts?	i think its nice.
Create a Survey Search Surveys Go to bzoink!

hmms.

2004-11-19T22:27:00.000+08:00

Really Long Survey (over 200)
Created by starsbleed2nite and taken 47283 times on bzoink!
What is your name?	Charmaine Chan. That's mee!
Are you named after anyone?	Nopeee!
What's your screename?	# charmsss
Would you name a child of yours after you?	No waeee! It will be so weirdd kaee!
If you were born a member of the opposite sex what would your name be?	Lester. I like da ncame lahh.
If you could switch names with a friend who would it be?	Siobhan. Its shee-von. Budd it sounds cool lah.
Are there any mispronounciations/typos that ppl do w/ your name constantly?	Charmern. Yeppes. Or Sher-maine. Wrong!
Would you drop your last name if you became famous?	Nahhs.
Basics
Your gender:	Female.
Straight/Gay/Bi:	Straight.
Single?	NOPEE!
If not, do you want to be?	YESH! erms, i dunnoe.
Birthdate:	14 november 1990.
Your age:	14
Age you act:	14.
Age you wish you were:	18!! Zouk!!!
Your height:	165 cm.
Eye color:	goldish brown.
Happy with it?	definitely.
Hair color:	brown.
Happy with it?	yahh lahh!
Lefty/righty/ambidextrous:	righty.
Your living arrangement:	as in?
Your family:	dad,mum,bro.
Have any pets?	my rabbit frosty.
Whats your job?	student.
Piercings?	2.
Tattoos?	i want one lahh! at my arm. hahas.
Obsessions?	you you you!
Addictions?	vodka and coke.
Do you speak another language?	chinese. canto.
Have a favorite quote?	Fuck you lahh.
Do you have a webpage?	www.jeff-maines.blogspot.com
Deep Thoughts About Life and You in it
Do you live in the moment?	maybe.
Do you consider yourself tolerant of others?	yeshhh! veryy!
Do you have any secrets?	of course.
Do you hate yourself?	sometimes.
Do you like your handwriting?	not badd lahh.
Do you have any bad habits?	duhhs! im nt a perfect person.
What is the compliment you get from most people?	im forgiving and i've a big heart.
If a movie was made about your life, what would it be called?	sorrows.
What's your biggest fear?	HEART-BREAKING.
Can you sing?	maybe. maybe not.
Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool?	hahas, yahh. grinss-
Are you a loner?	not really.
What are your #1 priorities in life?	my studies.
If you were another person, would you be friends with you?	of coss! hahas. im a fun person. -.-"
Are you a daredevil?	nope.
Is there anything you fear or hate about yourself?	my size.
Are you passive or agressive?	ermss-
Do you have a journal?	yeppers.
What is your greatest strength and weakness?	my greatest strength is that im strong,able to stand up wen i fall. weakness ; i have low self-esteem.
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?	my size. hahas.
Do you think you are emotionally strong?	yeppers.
Is there anything you regret doing/not doing in life?	i regret ; not telling someone i love him and i lost him as a result. i dun regret spending most of my time smsing him and i got my hp line cut and got whacked by my parents.
Do you think life has been good so far?	nope.
What is the most important lesson you've learned from life?	anything can happen tmr.
What do you like the most about your body?	my hands.
And least?	my boobs.
Do you think you are good looking?	well ; normal.
Are you confident?	NEVER.
What is the fictional character you are most like?	ermss-
Are you perceived wrongly?	huhs?
Do You...
Smoke?	nope.
Do drugs?	nope.
Read the newspaper?	ermss, the life section.
Pray?	yeshh,everydae.
Go to church?	yeppers.
Talk to strangers who IM you?	yuppers.
Sleep with stuffed animals?	nopee.
Take walks in the rain?	i love it.
Talk to people even though you hate them?	yeppes.
Drive?	nope.
Like to drive fast?	nope.
Would or Have You Ever?
Liked your voice?	its so fucking low.
Hurt yourself?	yeshh, banging my head against the wal.
Been out of the country?	duhs.
Eaten something that made other people sick?	errrs-
Been in love?	yesh.
Done drugs?	no no no!
Gone skinny dipping?	no lahh!
Had a medical emergency?	nopee.
Had surgery?	yesh, to cut off a mole on my eye lid.
Ran away from home?	once.
Played strip poker?	nopers.
Gotten beaten up?	hahas, in pri school.
Beaten someone up?	yeppers.
Been picked on?	yeppers.
Been on stage?	yah!
Slept outdoors?	nope.
Thought about suicide?	many times.
Pulled an all nighter?	huhs-
If yes, what is your record?	?
Gone one day without food?	i dun think so.
Talked on the phone all night?	nope.
Slept together with the opposite sex w/o actually having sex?	hahas, yahh.
Slept all day?	nope.
Killed someone?	if i did, i wldnt be here typing all this shite.
Made out with a stranger?	errs- no!
Had sex with a stranger?	no!
Thought you're going crazy?	yeshh!
Kissed the same sex?	face yesh.
Done anything sexual with the same sex?	no wae!
Been betrayed?	many times.
Had a dream that came true?	of coursee.
Broken the law?	drinking?
Met a famous person?	yeppesss!
Have you ever killed an animal by accident?	errrs, no!
On purpose?	nope!
Told a secret you swore you wouldn't tell?	yeshh, guilty-
Stolen anything?	yeppers. mentos.
Been on radio/tv?	nahhs.
Been in a mosh-pit?	huhhs-
Had a nervous breakdown?	noppes.
Bungee jumped?	nahhs.
Had a dream that kept coming back?	yessssssssssss~!
Beliefs
Belive in life on other planets?	yahhs.
Miracles?	yepps.
Astrology?	of cos.
Magic?	nope.
God?	OF COURSE!
Satan?	Fuck you!
Santa?	Nopee.
Ghosts?	Yeshh!
Luck?	Yahhs.
Love at first sight?	Yepperss.
Yin and yang (that good cant exist w/o bad)?	errs-
Witches?	nopeee!
Easter bunny?	huhhs-
Believe its possible to remain faithful forever?	of corse.
Believe theres a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow?	no wae.
Do you wish on stars?	nopee.
Deep Theological Questions
Do you believe in the traditional view of Heaven and Hell?	yeppers.
Do you think God has a gender?	Errs, yahs.
Do you believe in organized religion?	yeppers
Where do you think we go when we die?	heaven!
Friends
Do you have any gay/lesbian friends?	yeppers ; bud hu cares.
Who is your best friend?	Many many.
Who's the one person that knows most about you?	Rina.
What's the best advice that anyone has ever given to you?	Let the person go if u love him/her, if its meant to be, the love wil be returned.
Your favourite inside joke?	errs-
Thing you're picked on most about?	errs-
Who's your longest known friend?	dan lahh.
Newest?	nigel?
Shyest?	errs- dunnoe?
Funniest?	dan.
Sweetest?	gabriel.
Closest?	errs-
Weirdest?	yuker.
Smartest?	meijing.
Ditziest?	huhhs-
Friends you miss being close to the most?	dan,rina,mandy,natalie,jolene,chanwei,marcus,gabriel,jeremy,dewayne.
Last person you talked to online?	vincent.
Who do you talk to most online?	melissa,vincent,rina,carine,rellien,bf,mandy,jolene.
Who are you on the phone with most?	carine.
Who do you trust most?	rina quek.
Who listens to your problems?	carine.
Who do you fight most with?	my bf hahas.
Who's the nicest?	hmms-
Who's the most outgoing?	melissa. hahas.
Who's the best singer?	dan hahas.
Who's on your shit-list?	errs-
Have you ever thought of having sex with a friend?	no waee!
Who's your second family?	ermss.
Do you always feel understood?	yeshh.
Who's the loudest friend?	dan,carine.
Do you trust others easily?	nope.
Who's house were you last at?	errs-
Name one person who's arms you feel safe in:	my bf. hahas.
Do your friends know you?	errs-some.
Friend that lives farthest away:	melissa-jurong!
Love and All That
Do you consider love a mistake?	yesh.
What do you find romantic?	errs- spending the time watching sunrise. eating breakfast together. a time at home. dancing wid slow music. yahhs.
Turn-on?	errs-
Turn-off?	errs-
First kiss?	last year.
If someone u had no interest in had interest in dating u how would u feel?	pretty guilty.
Do you prefer knowing someone before dating them or going	before dating them.
Have u ever wished it was more socially acceptable 4 a girl 2 ask a guy out	of course!
Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractiv	i like 2 person before. both of them are pretty fine.
Do you think the opposite sex finds you good looking?	maybe.
What is best about the opposite sex?	he has a dick.
What is the worst thing about the opposite sex?	he has a dick/
What's the last present someone gave you?	levis bag.
Are you in love?	yeshh.
Do you consider your significant other hot?	huhhs-
Who Was the Last Person...
That haunted you?	you!
You wanted to kill?	my bf lahh! hahas
That you laughed at?	carine.
That laughed at you?	my broo!
That turned you on?	hahas, my bf lahh.
You went shopping with?	i cant rmb.
That broke your heart?	dan!! fucker.
To disappoint you?	dan dan dan.
To ask you out?	zen. yahhs.
To make you cry?	my bf.
To brighten up your day?	carineee
That you thought about?	errs-
You saw a movie with?	my bf.
You talked to on the phone?	carine.
You talked to through IM/ICQ?	vincent.
You saw?	dad.
You lost?	dan-fuck yah.
Right This Moment...
Are you going out?	nope.
Will it be with your significant other?	huhs?
Or some random person?	huhs?
What are you wearing right now?	pyjamas.
Body part you're touching right now:	my kegg.
What are you worried about right now?	that i gonna hve sore yes tmr still.
What book are you reading?	nth!
What's on your mousepad?	mouse lahh!
Use 5 words to describe how you're feeling:	sick.tired.lazy.sleepy.mad.
Are you bored?	yeshh!
Are you tired?	yeshh!
Are you talking to anyone online?	nopee!
Are you talking to anyone on the phone?	carinee!
Are you lonely or content?	lonely.
Are you listening to music?	micheal buble.
Create a Survey Search Surveys Go to bzoink!

yayy!

2004-11-19T11:15:00.000+08:00

I have been deprived of sufficient rest since tuesday. We had chalet on Wed and Thurs. It was so fucking fun lahh. And I realised I got some night sickness thingy.

We checked in on wed. Rellien's uncle helped us wid it cos we weren't 18. We met at Pasir Ris Mrt first. Carine,Manda,Keith,Xiong,Rellien,Alex, and I were the people who organised this whole chalet thing. Actually it was rellien who wants it, budd we are just the bomb shelters.

The chalet room was actually kinda cool. There's downstairs and upstairs. Wed was kinda unorganised. We had insuficent money to buy food and pay for the chalet room. Thank god, we had two rich ass wid us, which is xiong and keith. So that made us able to have some food and drinks.

The uncle was kinda cock lahh. They bought alcohol and he dint even know. Juss scan it liddat. Budd I dint even drink it. I dint drink it. Cause xiong was pretty pissed when i wanted to.
Carine and I cycled like mad. Budd she cant balance me properly. Maybe I was too heavy. Budd xiong and I rode that two person bike well. Yayy! So Xiong was challenging wid Carine for some bike race thing, Of cause, Carine won. She was jus carrying my weight budd xiong was carrying mine and his.

Barbeque at nitee. Hahas. We had fun actually. So many people were in that room and lights were off. Me and Xiong had a great time disgusting Carine.

Those buncha people are great fun please. And erms, I was too tired by the end of wed. I cant even open my eyes.

Thurs :

We reached around 11 plus. Carine, Xiong and I went to mac to eat first. We were so mean, juss left all the other people in the chalet. Xiong brought his ps2. Budd what! He forgot his controller.
So yahh, me and him sat a taxi to his house. So unfair, his house is like those corner bunglow. Fucking bigg and nice please!!!!! Not fair not fair ! And he brought that bear i gave him to the chalet along too. So cute lahh.

WE quarreled and I dont tok to him fer bout 2 hrs. Cause I thought he was angry wid me not sitting on his lap. Bud he wasnt. So i jus went oudd without telling him anything, I left him worried i guess.

At nite, bbq all dae. Keith and Carine are gud grillers please. Singapore Idol.
Olinda is going oud I guess. Sads.
The potential person is Taufik. I dun really fancy him neither do I hate him.
Dad was drunk and I had a hard time calling him to come and pick me.
My mum nearly wanted me to stay overnight.
Bud my dad called so gotta went home.
He was drink-driving. And he was driving round and round. -.-" I nearly lost my life please.

Thats all fer the two daes.

heyss

2004-11-16T15:55:00.000+08:00

I hate you when you hurt me.
And when you hurt me,
the pain is excruciating.
Please lahh.
Im gonna be a kind soul
and forget boudd stuff.

Hols are getting so boring.
Im so tired.

hmms

2004-11-15T22:06:00.000+08:00

It was my bdae yesterday.
I had a fucking fun time please.
Some last min arrangments.
After church, my dad flew me off to escape!
I had a fucking gud time.
Amanda, Keith, Rellien, Alex, Me and Xiong.
Like so little people onlie.
Wanted to ask more ;
budd last min so yahh.
Dear bought me a bdae cake lahh.
Damn sweet kae.
Den im like shy.
We tried all the frigging giddy rides kae.
Den he was like squeezing my hand so tightly.
I guessed he was pretty scared.
Bud he jus tried it wid me cos he wanted me to be hapie and had someone.
Thats really nice lahh.
I screamed like mad. like mad.
I've lil voice now.
Oh yahh.
He spend a bomb on my prezzies lahh.
Levis bag,ring,usher cd,cap,porsche figurine.
Love em all.
After all, it wasnt a that bad dae.
Went to ate at my fav teochew restaurant. WEE
yahh, so yepps.
bro bot me a roxy bagg.
N parents gave me $.
Nice dae.
Bud i m missing somethingg.

Todaee.
Went to orchard.
To buy clothes.
Spend 200 plus.
Hahahs.
So happiee!

shite

2004-11-13T21:45:00.000+08:00

Todae was a ok dae.
Had major moodswings.
Saw Kris and ppl ard.
Dam fuck lahh.
Its a weird bdae wish this yr.
Its so impossible.
I can juss cry thinking boud it.
Im trying to like, stop thinking boudd it.
I hate it lahh.
Sad lahh.

yayy!

2004-11-11T19:33:00.000+08:00

Today is sucha rocking dae pls.
I went to town.
The most pissing fact is.
That fucking Dan Tan didnt come.
He ass lahh.
He told me not to be late and stuff liddat.
In the end, what happen?
When everyone reached,
he was still sleeping.
My fucking mood was spoilt because of himm.
Than garfield was like.
Charmaine so sad alreadyy.
Yesterdayy still flying when talking to him on da fone.
After all ;
he's da best bomb. as in for my guy frens lahh.
He like promised me kaee!
And we were talking on the phone ytd.
Like after zillion years.
Budd in the end,
garfield and peeps cheered me.
We ate a mac.
Like a reunion.
That taka mac reminded me of stuff.
the first time i went oud wid my frens.
i was wid rina,mandy,natalie,jolene,garfield and dan.
budd fucking dan wasnt ard.
Never mind,
we talked abt our pri sch lifee.
The main topic was abt me actualie.
Kinda sadd.
I dont like to be reminded of the past.
A nice past being shattered?
Doesnt seem gud yesh?
Took neoprints.
Neoprints are nicee.
Had fun wid lame faces and stuff.
Walked frm heeren to far east.
So tired my godd.
I saw zoe and miko ard.
Miko didnt see me.
At firs i dint really realise it was zoe.
Den jus stood dere looking at her.
Den i remembered her and smiled.
I think i was too troubled wid stuff lahh.
hahas.
I dint buy much stuff actualie.
Budd its a nicee dae ard in townn.
I hope we have more meetings.
And i hope,
this time ard.
Fucking dan wun pang seh me again.
hate yoo lahh!

hate

2004-11-09T12:47:00.000+08:00

my parents quarreled like mad todae.
i thought they resembled me and weixiong.
if we ever get married ;
im very sure we would be like my parents now.
i dun admit to my mistakes ;
while xiong gets angry at the slightest stuff.
i juss msged him.
he jus said a 'Hi'
i guess he cant be bothered to msg me too.
i knoe he's sad that we can't meet.
does he understand tat im sad too.
cos im da one that caused the both of us not to meet.
yoo know the sense of guilt thingy.
budd he don have to complain n complain.
its not my fault that i have strict parents.
i want to meet youu everyday too.
bud i cant.
and its liddat.
cos u have fallen for a gal wid strict parents.
im facing so much shite now.
do u understand?
its not that i dun wanna tell u stuff.
sometimes ;
without telling you my probs.
we save all the trouble.
and fights.
i really hope to go back to the days.
when we are jus god bro n sis.

fuck yoo

2004-11-09T01:33:00.000+08:00

i'm sick and tired of yoo groaning every single fucking dae.
yoo claim i dun understand u?
do yoo even understand me?
do u knoe wad i want and stuff?
go talk to rellien, if yoo need her.
i cant understand yoo.
sometimes ;
jus talking to yoo.
can fucking make my tears flow.
i dun even think we arent meant for one another.
11 mths so wad?
no progress or whatsoever.
i never ever asked yoo to give in to me.
cant yoo stop being a spoilt brat.
i hate yoo lah.
i got into sucha fucked upp class.
i shuddup.
i got so many probs wid my parents.
i shudup.
u make me angry and heart-broken.
i shuddup.
people say bad things boud u and ask me break
i shuddup.
im sad that i cant meet yoo.
i shuddup.
do u ever knoe how i feel?
all you know is to complain.
do you think i feel very nice?
i beginning to wonder if you really even love me.
cos im wondering if i really love yoo.
or isit cause there's a reason fer me loving yoo.
so many things in dere.
deep in me.
i wanna find someone to share.
budd no one is there.
to understand me.
you're always the one ;
that wil be the last to ever console me.
everything i do is wrong.
im the loser that makes ur life suck.
im nothing to yoo.
yoo only love the feeling i give yoo.
and not love me for me.
showing tantrums on me and stuff.
i hate your fucking complains.
if i m nt gud enuff.
go get someone neww.
i got no feeling fer this love we share animore.

Awww

2004-11-07T17:46:00.000+08:00

My darling Carine is off to Korea.
She's leaving me all alone here in Spore.
No more morning or midnite calls.
My tution is starting tomorrow.
So gonna start studying soon.
This year is coming to an end.
Its so fast.
I hope its liddat every year.
So that I grow up quick.
Went to town ;
and bought two tops.
I haven't decided what I want fer my bdae yet.

haiiz

2004-11-06T13:23:00.000+08:00

So here it is.
I'm gonna be in 3/4 next year.
I'm kinda sadd.
Budd I'm fine lahh.
My boyfren got ino the 2nd class in his school.
Smart arse.
I'm so gonna study hard fer next year.
That I bought my textbooks already.
And my friends were like, WHOA!
I frigging feel like transfering school alrites.
So that I go into a better class.
Bud the thing is that, their 2nd class is abt the same as the subs I takingg.
My mum got a new maths n sci teacher fer me.
That means my present maths tutor is gonee.
Like so sad lahh.
My bdae is coming.
Bud I don't feel excited.
This holiday is so fucking boring.
I hope someone organises a damn party or sth.

Wondering if I'm doing the right stuff now.
Wonder if this whole relationship should go on.
Kinda miracle we lasted a long waee.
Do I really love him or is it just an infatuation?
I just don't feel right boudd this whole thing.
Yahhs, thats why I am always having moodswingss.
So shite laaaaaa

Boredd

2004-11-04T17:11:00.000+08:00

Tommorow is Fashion Fiesta yeshh.
Gonna support Bro and Rellien dere.
I miss my bro!!
I hope my camera has euough film my gawd.
Bdae is next week!
Tmr is like, streaming results.
Tomorrow wil be a bz daee I guess.
Buy new textbooks,fashion fiesta.
Ohhh.
And yah, the show The Champion drives me craze.
This Yilin person in the show is sucha bitch!
And Jiajun has no balls.
I knoe how Kaixin feels.
Cause I was once in her shoes.
And it suxx.

madd

2004-11-03T16:10:00.000+08:00

What a nice nice nice dae it is todaee.
Haven't been this happie fer longgg.
Wen to town todae wid ;
Rellien and Alex, Amanda and Keith, Weixiong.
Rellien and Alex and Amanda and Keith couldnt seem to be together.
Can't they juss sae Hi and sth liddat.
So yepps, half a dae, we weren't talking and stuff liddat.
Till we watched the movie Ladder 49.
That shows sucks laaaaaaaaaaaa.
I wasn't even watching.
Hahahahs. -Horny Grin-
Sweet, slow and whoaa!
Shhhhhhh!
Shant elaborate.
Yes, so I'm in a good mood lahh.
Next thurs meeting him, as in my 6/9 frens.
And yahh, I not spending my bdae overseass!
So yes, can celebrate wid my frensss!
And my 11th month is then too!
Fuck!
I wana get into 3/5!

bleahs

2004-11-02T09:01:00.000+08:00

Boring daes ; when school is oudd.
Missing those lame crapp in school.
I have never seemed to treasure my classes when I was in themm.
6/9 (2002), 1/4 (2003), 2/6( 2004)
School lifeee is just so great.
Got a neww tutor fer science.
Hope he works fer mee.
Getting results this fri.
I am gonna appeal fer 3/5.
Well, thats what my dad sae laaa.
I'm having major moodswings these few daes.
You can see me being all active a second.
And the next second, I'm so down and stuff like that.
And my period isnt even here.
I hope to organise this small party thingy when my bdae comes.
Who am I gonna invite??
Lets see.
Xiong,Rina,Mandy,Natalie,Jolene,Marcus,Dan,Chanwei,Jeremy,Gabriel,Dewayne,Joanne-Sis,Minhua-kor,Lam,Shih-han,Jiyang,Ching Shing(Erms, everyone that my god-bro wanns la.), June,Melinda,Gen,Melieee,Cheryl,Rellien,Carine,Cass,Changi,Melissa,Kang Li,Addams,Amanda,Xinni,Twins,Stacey( the whole class laaaa!)
Like so many ppl kaee.
Yupp, still considering mann.
Christmas is coming.
And I got to have a hole in my pocket soon.
And I havent bought fer more than 10 ppl prezies yett!

wad a daee.

2004-10-29T16:17:00.000+08:00

Sucha bad dae I guess.
I'm just trying to forget all aboud stuff.
And be forgiving.
I dont think I am gonna be able to talk to you nicely alreadyy.
I just dont seem very right boud this whole thing.
It's the last day of school todaee.
Dunno whys I am pretty sadd.
I love 2/6.
I toook pics wid ppl like Melinda,June,Gen,Ria,Carine,Alisa,Rellien and Cheryl.
Wanted to take wid melieee,budd dunno where she flew to!
Kinda nicee lahh.
Bud the feeling was so sad liddat.
This year passed really quickly.
Very very.
I didn't think it was a very nice year.
I thougt it kinda sucked.
School life was nice thouu.
I dunno who's gonna be in the same class wid me next year yeshh.
I just miss my classmates.
I hope there's this chalet thingy lah.
Cant wait to see all the pics.
I cant xplain how I'm feeling now.
Bud silence is golden.
I'm gonna hide all my feelings from now onn.
Drown it wid alcohol.
I hate my life.

ahh

2004-10-27T22:51:00.000+08:00

I'm so angry now.
I think I can kill everyone in this world.
I can't believe you said that to me.
How can yoo being my bf say that to me.
I got many frens who think you are heartless.
I bet you dunno wad i'm sad of.
Since when you understand me?
Perhaps,its time for a break upp.
Get yourself a prettier gf and fuck of my life!

happening rocks

2004-10-25T22:34:00.000+08:00

watched that 9 o clock showw.
made me thought of something.
when you have a cursh on someone,
and you think that person likes yoo.
so every little thing sweet that person does fer yoo.
yoo feel so sweet.
you smile so much.
budd when you got that person,
this sweet feeling seems to fade awayy.
perhaps its human nature,
to take ur loved ones for granted.

mee!

2004-10-25T18:37:00.000+08:00

Your always have goals to achieve and you can do everything to fulfill the dreams of those who loves you. You have a sketch of an ideal in your mind and you always search for that personality. Your friends means a lot to you and you can do everything for the sake of your friend, you a normally found to be an emotional personality. You have a very less control on your patience and due to this sometimes you over react.

This shitee up here is some quiz thingg lahh.
Its so meeee!

School was kinda funn todaee.
We had this hip hop dancing thangg.
I dint havee the mucha mood todaee.
I got my moodswingss.
So yepps, dint realeh dance.
Got this damn irritationg reflections thing.
Cant stand it..
Talentime was nicee.
Theres this indian gurl super farnnii.
=))
hahahs.
I couldnt meet yoo todaee.
Pretty sad yeshh.
I'm hoping to see yoo tomorrow.
Jeremy and Marcus wanted me to go to Khs.
But I cant.
So sadd! =S
I didnt meet them fer so longg.
I miss them like super muchh.
I hope they cutting less on their smoking habit.
yepps.
I gonna miss 2/6.

hehh.

2004-10-24T21:36:00.000+08:00

I dont want to miss a thing.
Kinda wish that there's this someone who wil sing me this song again.
Sucha sweet song,
wid such fond memories.
Maybe when someone sings me this songg,
the feeling won't be the same again.
Hehh.
I cant believe Maia got oudd.
Not that I love her,
budd she was preety gud that dae.
Hahas.
Her sparks friends dint vote fer her?
Lols.
Yesterdaee was sucha bad daee.
I cried so badly.
Its like.
I studied so hard fer maths.
Yet I failed,
whereas my fucking cousin,
he frigging slacker,
could pass cause his paper was easy.
Plus, me and bro quarreled so much.
So I cried.
Life have been pretty stressful.
Bcos of the decesions I make.
My birthday is coming soon.
And mum wants me to spend it in Malaysia!
No no no no!
I want to spend my bdae widd my frens n bf.
Like omg!
They are gonna gib me $ this yr to buy my present.
Instead of somethingg.
I went to many places todaee.
Church.
Taught about Pride.
Juss what I needed!
Then went to erm,
my dad friens house at jurong.
Super boringg.
Ate korean food at Orchard.
Went to Tcc after that.
The brownie super nicee.
And the musicc they play!
Waww!
My pimples are getting more and more.
And i've been popping them!
Mum forced me to go to my aunt's place.
She squeezed all my oil stuff oudd.
Frigging pain!
And applied mask.
I'm still wid the mask!
Hahh.

Haha

2004-10-21T21:36:00.000+08:00

I'm glad there are consistent readers like June that reads my blogg. Hahas.
It's a really boring dae today alrites.
Well, I just created friendster!
So my friends,pls add me!
A testimonial too!
I didnt do anything much todayy.
I spend the morning use the com.
I spend the afternoon sleeping.
When I woke up frm my nap,
my mum screwed me fer my phone bill.
$ 152.
I feel damn guilty.
I think I'm gonna work during hols.
How am I going to work?
Oh my god.
Singapore Idol todayy.
Taufik wasn't tt gud todae! (sorie june!)
Christopher. He's the best! Alrites,he was kinda great todayy.
Daphne. Cute! Nice voicee.
Maia. Alrites,I admit she did a vehh wonderful job today.
Olinda! I like her! Damn perfect todaee!
Slyvester! Gud gud! Okays,when he sang tt song,kinda cried. Past lar.
Leandra was fine!
Okays, I wil write till here!

*me myself and i*

long post.

long post.

long post.

long post.

bad

hey

sad

back

man

yay

ben

hmm

hey

haiz

man

haiz

hmm

gr

mann

mann

hmm

h

fuck

ben

hm

heyy

mann

boo

gee

shitified x(

sick

dict

sadd

shit

campp!

fuck

haiz

haiz

haiz

haiz

man

hmm

shite

fuck you.

im back!

dang

hmms.

iam fine

mans

ignorance is blissful.

i am sad

bored.

boring and sad!

shite u.

fucking boringg!

anotha dae.

high class?

urghs.

guysss!

hmms.

yayy!

heyss

hmms

shite

yayy!

hate

fuck yoo

Awww

haiiz

Boredd

madd

bleahs

wad a daee.

ahh

happening rocks

mee!

hehh.

Haha

me myself and i